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What I Learned After Being Trolled on the Internet

The internet is the wild fucking west! So ya better put on your chaps, cowboy and buckle up for this rodeo!

The trolls did not like what I had to say. Look, motherhood is not for everyone, being a choice or circumstance or none of anyone's goddamned business. What is important is not your choices per se, but how you are providing spaces for people to live freely and fully, no matter what role they are playing. Being child free is NOT anti-motherhood and vice versa. What would be DOPE is just a "hey, good for you! How can I support you" and keeping it moving!

Since pushing comfort zones, and getting the backlash is NOT my first go round at the rodeo, I recognize why being here and providing the space I do and creating this community is so dang necessary:

Being able to state what you want beyond the limiting societal norms is HARD.

After a week of trolling, hateful DMs and lots of push back from the interwebs, here's why it can be so freaking difficult to not just acknowledge your truth, but stand in it, too (oh and NO, names have not been changed. This is a fuck around and find out moment and it is GIVING)


The Gaslighting is REAL

Nothing worse than having YOUR reality denied. Cool. It may not be true for everyone AND it is true for you. Not about being right or wrong, but about being able to fully express your truth, safely.

Stating of different opinions gets mocked and criticized

It is shocking that people will insert opinions when not asked ONLY TO judge, shame and criticized. Imagine going on to someone's page and telling them that having a baby is limiting and useless because everything in the world in contaminated so what's the point!??! Omg. IMAGINE??

The patriarchy is RIPE and STRONG

In 2023, there are still these belief sets that offer very little space for deviation, which can lead to lots of silencing and warrior mentality: force over kindness. Again, find what works for you, cool. I am not on Christian mingle on my soapbox, ya know?

Name calling hurts, even from strangers.

When someone feels powerless, name calling is a from of control. "if I knock you down, you will stop making ME uncomfortable." Logically, we know these comments come from a broken place of irrelevant people, it is an energy that is a challenge to deflect especially when you can't fathom ever being so...mean.

The Internet is not safe if you lack, confidence, clarity and support.

Being on the internet is like the fucking wild west! If you are curious & contemplating what kind of life you want, you need to be ROCK SOLID within yourself and have support in your corner in order to handle the push back. It becomes clear why folks would rather stuff themselves in boxes, stay silent and fit in: survival! It can SEEM easier in the short term to just give in and make choices like everyone else, but the long term impacts of that are at the expense of your own joy, purpose and worth.

There are kind, supportive and like-minded people all over this world.

You just have to elevate and get clear on who you want to connect with. THIS is what happens when you start creating the circle of supportive humans.


Yep! That is just a regular day in the life of a vocal woman calling in all folks who may be questioning the status quo. Don't worry. I am SO GOOD. I have been dealing with these type of callous comments and seemingly innocuous mocks and aggressions from my family, friends and those in close proximity for well over a decade. So, we gucci when it's circus clowns on the internet.

Overall, here is the BIGGEST takeaway of why it is hard:

IF you are not secure in WHO you are and feel backed, championed and understood, these comments smack like bullets into your life plan and ruin authentic dreams real quick. It is really easy to see WHY people would rather conform that be outcasted. it is like a biological need for safety to want to be part of something.

So, rather than change YOU to find safety in your community, change your fucking community.

Having spaces for folks question, share and find non-judgmental support to make choices that WORK FOR THEM, especially ones that challenge rigid societal norms, is so fucking needed.

And here is the FUNDA-FUCKING-MENTAL difference between me and the internet trolls: They use force.

I use my power. Power is safe, grounding, supportive and validating. No one is trying to blame or coerce, shame or judge. Simply a space of share and gain some tools for self discovery, possibly opening up options beyond what was possible when surrounded by force lingering trolls with force lingering tactics.

So tap in!!!!! Join this movement community for folks LIKE YOU who are throwing middle fingers up at conventionality, limiting patriarchal beliefs and going after a life on their terms, and what makes them happy. It is a supportive space to engage in self-awareness and build self confidence to be able to choose experiences and situations that work FOR YOU without shame, guilt and judgement

I see you and you matter!!!



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